Raise your hand if you felt personally victimized by ABC for not releasing the cast bios until FOUR DAYS before “The Bachelorette” started.
I mean, sweet Moses! We need ample time to carefully research our picks, ABC. We comb through those bios. Check up on contestants’ social media accounts. This isn’t a rush-order job.
Me, researching my picks, this weekend:
We kick off Season 13 of “The Bachelorette” with extremely high hopes thanks to our intelligent, beautiful Bach, Rachel — the show’s first ever POC Bachelor or Bachelorette, which is insane. Are we very nervous that the show/its contestants will not handle the subject of race delicately? Oh, yeah, you bet.
We put out a call on Twitter for new suggested points categories and we got some great ones. In fact, we chose three of your suggestions, and we’ll file away some of the others for wildcard points to pepper in throughout the season.
If you’ve never played before, or if this is your SEVENTH season playing, read on for the details below. Welcome to the 75th Annual Hunger Games!
HOW OUR BACHELORETTE FANTASY LEAGUE WORKS
1) Gather your “Bachelorette”-loving friends and coworkers, and choose a League Commissioner. The Commissioner is responsible for tallying league members’ points each week and sharing the standings with the league.
2) Choose how your league is going to run your draft (read more on that below) and submit your contestant picks to your league commissioner.
3) Watch “The Bachelorette” every Monday night, beginning May 22 on ABC.
4) Visit this blog every Tuesday to see how each of your contestants scored. The league commissioner should add up the point totals for each team in order to figure out the weekly rankings. You can use our BachFantasy Scoring Template to keep track of your league members’ scores.
You have a few options when it comes to drafting your Bachelorette fantasy league team of five contestants. Click here to read more about how to draft your team.
When picking contestants, you’re the team owner. So, go with your gut. The Crazies earn a lot of points (and they’re the very lifeblood of the show’s existence), but you’ll be most rewarded for picking contestants who go the distance.
Points are divided into Phrases, Actions, and Roses. We post a wildcard points category on Twitter every Monday before the episode airs, so be sure to follow us there for the latest info.
There will also be a mid-season draft after Episode 5 in which you’ll be able to add one player to your team if it’s no longer intact. Don’t worry about that for now; there will be more deets later. Onto the points!
We’ve added three (count ’em, THREE) sparkling new points categories this year: Talking shit to the Bachelorette about another contestant in the house, by name (20 points); Shoving another contestant (20 points); and Being hugged by the Bachelorette with the leg wraparound (10 points).
We also made an update to an old category. In the past, a contestant only received points for saying the phrase “not here for the right reasons” to the Bachelor/ette. This season, we did away with that last part. If a contestant utters those magical words at any point on-air, he gets points.
- Talking about his parents’ relationship (5 points)
- Mentioning his kid (5 points)
- Mentioning a deceased loved one (10 points)
- Mentioning a previous fiancee or wife (10 points)
- Expressing fear of a date activity (10 points)
- Discussing his virginity (15 points)
- Saying that someone in the house “is not here for the right reasons” (15 points) [UPDATED FOR 2017]
- Saying “I’m not here to make friends” (15 points)
- Talking shit to the Bachelorette about another contestant in the house, by name (20 points) [NEW IN 2017]
- Saying “I’m falling for/in love with you” to the Bachelorette or “I’m falling for/in love with him” to the camera (20 points)
- Saying “I love you” to the Bachelorette (30 points)
- Being told “I love you” by theBachelorette (50 points)
- Interrupting someone’s one-on-one time (5 points)
- Bonus: using the phrase “steal [the Bachelorette] away” during said interruption (5 points)
- Dancing (5 points)
- Wearing a helmet (5 points)
- Singing or playing an instrument for the Bachelorette (5 points)
- Hot tubbing (5 points)
- Giving the Bachelorette a gift (5 points)
- Going on a picnic (5 points)
- Must be sitting on the ground
- Wearing a costume or clothing native to another culture/country (5 points)
- Being hugged by the Bachelorette with legs wrapped around him (10 points) [NEW IN 2017]
- Attending a concert (10 points)
- Riding in a helicopter (10 points)
- Riding on a boat (10 points)
- Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
- Being apart of the “team” who wins alone time with the Bachelorette on a group date (15 points)
- Appearing visibly drunk (15 points)
- Meeting the Bachelorette’s family and/or friends (15 points)
- Shoving another contestant (20 points) [NEW IN 2017]
- Interrupting a rose ceremony to ask to speak with the Bachelorette alone (20 points)
- Needing medical attention at any point (20 points)
- Crying on camera (25 points)
- Must actually see moisture fall; we’re sticklers on this
- Having a secret girlfriend at home (25 points)
- Having a body part blurred out any point (30 points)
- Only for nudity; having your mouth blurred for profanity doesn’t count
- Leaving the show early on his own accord (30 points)
- Drafting the next Bachelor on your team (40 points)
- Coming back to the show to beg for another chance (50 points)
- Getting the First Impression Rose (35 points, only available first night)
- Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
- Being selected to go on a one-on-one date (20 points)
- Being selected to go on a two-on-one date (30 points)
- Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
- Getting the rose on a group date (now worth 35 points)
- Getting the rose on a two-on-one date (40 points)
- Making it to Hometown Dates (50 points)
- Accepting the Fantasy Suite (75 points)
- Refusing the Fantasy Suite when the Bachelorette is game (-75 points)
- Proposing or being proposed to (85 points)
- Winning the Final Rose (100 points)
Each week, we’ll announce the wildcard category for the next episode on Twitter (so follow us there for up-to-date info). It will change each week, and is only awarded to one man per episode. For example, one wildcard category might be: the first man to break into song this week gets 25 points.
We’ll score each episode for you and post each contestant’s scores every Tuesday. Be sure to check back every Tuesday to see how your teams are stacking up against one another within your own league. We’ll also be posting an episode recap for those of you just can’t get enough Bach.
Will you be joining us this season? Let us know your league or individual team name in the comments. We love your puns.
P.S. You can sign up to get an email every time we post by entering your email address in the widget at the very bottom of the page.