Bach Fantasy

If there’s any takeaway from last night’s episode, it’s that I’m not using my luggage to its full potential. Overall, we saw Chad double-down on his Chadness: eating deli meat by the fistful, threatening other men’s teeth, and generally spitting some uncomfortable truths about the actual length of time generally required before you can fall in love with a person. Like all good #Bachelor and #Bachelorette villains, Chad has gone off-script, and we’re HERE for it.

A couple of caveats before we dig into points:

• On the second group date, we awarded dancing points for gentlemen partaking in the so-called “touchdown dance.”
• However, we didn’t award any proposal points. Technically, yes, several of the contestants “proposed” but that category is worth 85 points a pop — we intended the category to be reserved for the last remaining contestants. So no points awarded there.
• During the SECOND time they broke into song about JoJo, it was super hard to catch the entire group. There were two guys wearing hats who were hard to make out. I’m pretty sure one was Robby (I gave him the points), but the other one had his back entirely to the camera and I couldn’t tell who he was. If you have additional evidence that will help us identify this mystery singer, please share and we’ll update accordingly.

The wildcard points category of the night (announced on Twitter) was 20 points to the first man called at the rose ceremony. Alex scooped those up.

• Alex: 65 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Wildcard points: first dude called at the rose ceremony (20 points)
  • Getting a rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Ali: 40 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Getting a rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Brandon: 5 points
  • Singing (5 points)
• Chad: 100 points STAT CORRECTION
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Telling the Bachelorette that several contestants aren’t here for the right reasons (30 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Mentioning a deceased loved one (10 points)
  • Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
  • Interrupting someone’s one-on-one time (5 points)
  • Using the phrase “steal her away” during the interruption (5 points)
  • Getting a rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Chase: 35 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Giving a gift to the Bachelorette (fake snow) (5 points)
  • Getting a rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Christian: 45 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Getting a rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Daniel: 40 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Derek: 60 points
  • Being selected to go on a one-on-one date (20 points)
  • Going on a picnic (5 points)
  • Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Evan: 50 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Mentioning his kid (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Grant: 65 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Winning alone time with the Bachelorette on the group date (15 points)
  • Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• James F.: 40 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• James S.: 5 points
  • Singing (5 points)
• James Taylor: 65 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Singing or playing an instrument (the guitar) (5 points)
  • Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
  • Getting the group date rose (35 points)
• Jordan: 45 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Luke: 50 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Kissing the Bachelorette on the lips (10 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Nick B: 45 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Dancing (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Robby: 45 points
  • Singing (5 points)
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Vinny: 40 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Getting the rose to stay another week (25 points)
• Wells: 70 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)
  • Needing medical attention (20 points)
  • Getting the group date rose (35 points)
• Will: 15 points
  • Being selected to go on a group date (10 points)
  • Wearing a helmet (5 points)

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